How to be a Writer – Part Five

You’ve done it! You’re a famous writer and now everybody loves you. It was all worth it, wasn’t it? (Of course it was!!). And now that it’s the Year 2023 and Covid is no worse than the flu, it’s time to take your act…on the road! That’s right, my friend: you’re about to embark on a reading tour!!

But before you set out, let me run a hypothetical past you. It goes as follows: Your flight leaves in just over two hours. You realize you’re hungry, so you decide to go to Arby’s, because, well, they have the meats. In an effort to save time, you utilize their drive-thru. Only when you pull ahead and rifle through your order, you realize you didn’t get the Horsey sauce packets you requested. Now, do you A) Drive off and enjoy your sandwich ‘this much’ less for the lack of Horsey sauce? Or do you B) Squeal the tires, do a Tokyo Drift around the front of the restaurant and then double park behind four cars before storming inside and dropping the old “Do you know who I am??” card on top of the Assistant Manager in Training?

(This one is easy, folks; you really shouldn’t have to think too hard about it).

The correct answer, of course, is B. You’re a famous author now. And someone’s going to try to short you four packets of friggin’ Horsey sauce??

I don’t think so. Not on my watch. It doesn’t happen. So don’t let it happen to you!

Published by Dan Hendrickson - Writer

A comic, screenwriter and poet, I grew up in Northwest Minnesota. Years later, I earned my MFA in Creative Writing from Hamline University in St. Paul. I've been a guest on KFAI’s Write On! Radio and Prairie Public Radio’s Main Street. I have a new book out called Comedy Album. If you wished to do so, you could buy it.

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